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Can you restart a relationship?


Dear Peter,

You Have NO Choice

I know it may seem weird to have to start all over again in a relationship, but unfortunately, you do not have a choice. But trust me, I know exactly how you feel!

That's not the only reason they broke up. He also lied, which is unforgiveable.

Let's face it - there is a reason that both of you broke up. And ironically enough, it's for the exact same reason. You both did not want to get too close and be hurt. But you did anyway -- see my point?!?

When you love someone, you should let them know and not be afraid to hold back your feelings. That is the risk that you have to take when you get into a relationship. But that was already said and done. So on to your current problem...

There's Nothing Wrong With Being Friends

Not only is being friends a good sign, it also is a great way to rebuild trust.

You want to get back with this girl. Unfortunately she just wants to be friends. But you know what?!? There's nothing wrong with that. The way I see it, if she really hated you for the way you hurt her, she wouldn't even want to be friends.

She probably wants to set some deep roots for your relationship. A lot of couples can't even say that they are truly friends because they don't have a foundation for their relationship. Most importantly, she wants to know that she can really trust you again. And the only way she can do that without getting hurt again, is by getting as far away from you, yet close enough to still be in your life. The only way she can do that is by being - yup - you guessed it - FRIENDS!!!

Resolve Your Problems First

It's pretty obvious that she still cares about you a great deal. But you have to give her the time that she has asked for. I do believe in starting over again - but only if the persons involved had resolved their differences. That means communication. You have to talk to her about the problems that both of you face and come to an understanding. Or else when you do get back together that will only mean that the problem will resurface - instead of taking care of the problem before hand.

Risk Everything For Love

In all honesty, I cannot say for sure if she will ever get back together with you. Maybe, she doesn't even know for sure. And unfortunately, only time will tell. But in the mean time, do your own thing. Have fun! Besides, starting over is a great deal of work and it can ONLY work if BOTH parties are willing to risk it for -- kinda cheesy -- but LOVE.

Hope I've Helped,

-- Mel

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