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Am I wrong to exchange my engagement ring?


Dear Confused and Frustrated,

ReaderAgatha Why do you accuse her of being materialistic? Her husband got the ring HE wanted.

Boy are you materialistic!

Kara Jody, I disagree. She's not complaining about the size or value of the ring!


The Ring's Beauty Is Irrelevant

As you said yourself, this is the most important piece of jeweler that you will ever wear. Is it important because of the significance associated with it (i.e. he proposed with it, it was blessed at your wedding) or because it is the most beautiful ring that you own and just what you always wanted?

But what IS its significance? I think the wedding band is significant, not the engagement ring.

I contend that the ring is important because of its significance. Therefore, your husband is right. You should not trade it in.

Supply A Practical Reason For Exchanging It

If you are unable to wear your ring because it is too heavy or has a large stone that interferes with your daily activities, perhaps the two of you could meet with a jeweler to design a way of modifying the ring to meet your needs without completely replacing it.

Your Wants Are Sending The Wrong Message

Nooo. It sends the message that she TOLD him what she wanted and he should have listened to her instead of the saleslady. She has a right to be satisfied with how she looks.

Exchanging your ring for another one, sends a message to your husband that he is only as important to you as his ability to give you exactly what you want. Is this the message you want to send?

Don't Wear It If It's Too Formal

Many women wear the wedding bands at all times and only wear their engagement rings for special occasions. If you feel that the ring is too glitzy for daily wear or just not quite your style, this may be an option for you.

Wear It And Wait For Your 10th Anniversary

Right -- a special anniversary is a great idea. But why wait 10 years?.

Tell your husband that you will keep the ring and suggest that perhaps on your ten year anniversary he might allow you to pick out a ring that you like.

Why should she wait ten years for a ring he should have bought from the beginning?

Then, LET IT GO and wear the ring you have as what it is, a symbol of how much your husband loves you.



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