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Will he get over the past women in his life?

Dear Panel,

He told me from the beginning that he is hung up on his ex-girlfriend. He feels as if she was his sole mate, but she wants nothing to do with him. Then there is the ex-wife, he still does what ever she asks, just as if they were still married.

Will he ever get past these other women? Is there any chance for us?

-- Char

Female, age 34, Houston, TX

[read the entire question below]

Dear Panel,

I am a 34-year-old, single mother of one child who is almost 3 years old. I have been divorced for one year.

I met this man who is 40-years-old and has three children who are 7,9 and 11. He is also divorced and has been for three years.

His ex-wife has a boyfriend who basically lives with her. His ex-girl friend wants nothing to do with him and has told him so. She is actually getting back with her ex-husband. This guy and I have been seeing each other since the first of December, about 5 weeks now.

He's a Great Father

I feel very attracted to him. He is the type that is easy to fall in love with. He is a great father and spends quality time with his children, which is important to me.

He Told Me He's Hung Up On His Ex

He told me from the beginning that he is hung up on his ex-girlfriend. They have not seen each other in eleven months. He feels as if she was his sole mate, but she wants nothing to do with him. Actually she has even had her ex-husband call this guy and asked him not to contact her anymore. He doesn't call her but she is on his mind.

Then there is the ex-wife, he still does what ever she asks, just as if they were still married. Unless her boyfriend is over at her house. Then she cuts him off and treats him like poop. Basically she has her cake and is eating it too.

He Wants to Take It Slow

At this time he is telling me that he wants to take our relationship VERY slow because he wants to make sure that what he had with his ex-girlfriend is really gone. I think it is gone - after eleven months if she hasn't come back by now, chances are she won't.

But We've Already Had Sex

Even though he claims to be be taking the slow path, we have already consummated our relationship. I think this guy could be the one for me but I am not sure of why he is wanting to think of this ex-girlfriend and also why he is still on the honey-do list for his ex-wife.

I really like him, he is very cute, in shape, treats me with a great deal of respect, loves his children, like the same music I like, etc.

Will he ever get past these other women? Is there any chance for us?

-- Char

Female, age 34, Houston, TX

Aaron, Bella, Charlie, Reese, and Vivi answer this question.
 

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