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How could I let things go on so long?

Dear Panel,

I'm 30-years-old and I just broke off a engagement with a person who is 38-years-old. We had been dating for five years.

It was extremely difficult to break off but I realized I had to because I wasn't in love with him.

How could I let things go on so long? I feel like such a terrible person. How could I forgive myself? I believe I should suffer for this.

Will Deservedly Die Alone

Female, age 30, USA

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