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Dear Mosobie,
RED LIGHTS FLASHING***SIRENS BLARING*** Holy cow, there are SO
MANY signs that this is a mistake.
Virginity Is Not A Good Birthday Gift
I really don't understand what his birthday has to do with this
decision. If you want to give him something nice, try a watch or
a sweater, but not your virginity. This guy definitely doesn't seem
worthy.
I personally don't think age should be a factor in this decision
at all, but it's something that has to be considered. You're only
15-years-old, aside from losing your virginity, you could run the
risk of getting pregnant or catching an STD. Are you ready to be
someone else's mother? I'm 20 and I know I'm not and thinking "it
won't happen to me" is just stupid.
There Are ALL Kinds Of Horrible STDs
Sexually transmitted diseases (STDs) are infections that can be
spread by either secretions or fluids from the skin and mucosal
surfaces of the genitals, so you can catch some of these without
even doing the deed.
There are a lot of different STDs, but the most common ones in
the U.S. are herpes simplex virus (HSV-2) type II, chlamydia, gonorrhea,
syphilis and genital warts. Some infections that can be spread by
sex, such as the human immunodeficiency virus (HIV) and hepatitis
B virus, are not traditionally referred to as STDs since they also
can be spread by other means. You can even die if some of these
diseases go untreated.
The duration of STDs varies, depending on the specific type of
infection. In some cases, although symptoms may resolve without
treatment, you could be stuck with it for life and also run the
risk of passing it on to a partner during unprotected sexual activity.
With chlamydia or gonorrhea, treatment with antibiotics can shorten
symptoms by many days. Treatment for syphilis will avoid the potential
long-term complications.
You can help prevent STDs by, duh, practicing abstinence, having
a monogamous relationship (only one sex partner-but I'd pick someone
besides the Birthday Boy), ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS using condoms during
ANY sexual activity.
Condoms Aren't Foolproof
Something else that is important to remember, although condoms
can help reduce your exposure to STDs, they are not foolproof. Without
condoms, you're not just sleeping with him, either, you'll be forever
connecting yourself to every other person he's ever been with, and
they've ever been with, and so on and so on. YUCK. Bottom line,
no glove, no love.
People who are diagnosed with an STD could also be contacted by
their local health department, so that their sex partners can be
evaluated and treated. How much fun would THAT be?
Most physicians urge patients to tell their sex partners about
any diagnosed STD so that their partners can seek medical attention.
This is done for two reasons: First, some STDs are fairly silent
infections and can be passed unnoticed between sex partners.
For example, chlamydia may not cause symptoms in all those infected;
however, the scarring effect of the bacteria can lead to infertility,
especially in women. Second, STDs are seen as threats to public
health, and with proper identification and treatment, the rates
of infection can be reduced.
He's Immature And Selfish
The fact that he told you he always gets what he wants should be
reason enough NOT to give in this time. This man seems very selfish,
immature and unworthy of being anyone's boyfriend.
This decision is something that no one can decide for you. You'll
know when you're ready and you'll regret it if you're not ready.
I hope a little of what I've said will stick, but ultimately you're
in this one by yourself. You are all you have in this world, so
don't let anyone else guide your heart but you.
Best of Luck,
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