Snappy Answers Week of May 27, 2002

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Week of May 27, 2002: Here are short answers to 16 of the questions that we found in our mail box.

For more serious answers, please click on any of the other questions on the main page.

Dear Panel,

How do I get my boyfriend to make moves on me?

– M.

Female, age 14, USA

Why don't you just grab his hand. You ARE talking about holding hands, aren't you?

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Dear Panel, I have been kissing this boy and we slept together. Now we don't really talk but I really like him. How do I know how he feels? – Confused Lady Female, age 14, UK
	He probably felt unbelievably lucky and now maybe he feels guilty.
	Ask him, before putting the moves on him again.
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Dear Panel, How can I tell if my guy friend likes me to be his first girlfriend? – Miaka Yuuki Female, age 16, Philippines
	If he asks you out on a date.
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Dear Panel, I have been friends with this girl for a while now. We hadn't hung out too much in the past but lately I have been going to her house and watching movies. We both enjoy each other's company a lot and get along well. She also knows that I like her but I'm not sure if she likes me back, because I get no vibe. But the way she acts around me, it could be anything. I think it is flirting. She said she was falling for me, which was a good thing, but then we were talking the other day and I guess her friends think we are more than friends. She asked if I thought she was "leading me on?" Is this the same thing as "falling for me"? – M.B. Male, age 18, Canada
	No. It's the opposite.
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Dear Panel, What can I buy for my boyfriend's birthday? Some jewelry? – Beaver Female, age 14, Europe
	Anything BUT jewelry.
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Dear Panel, I'm 19 and my girlfriend is 16. We are both Christian and don't believe in premarital sex. I was just curious if it is OK to date as long as her parents don't mind? – Anonymous Male, age 19, Colorado
	Yes.
	If you have lust, you'd better get married real quick.
	Yes. Dating is fine. If no pre-marital sex is important to you, stick to group dates.
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Dear Panel, He use to love me but that's when I don't like him. But now I like him but he have a girlfriend and he won't talk to me no more. – Ashley Female, age 18, North America
	Jus caint splain it, cept maybe he got some sense.
	Give him time then ask him if he still likes you. He may be trying to forget you or has moved on. Maybe you should too.
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Dear Panel, The boy I like is 21 and I'm 16 and he wants sex. But he says it not all about the sex. I do like this boy, the way he talks, walks and a lot other thing I can't go into. Does five years matter with love? – Aaliyah Female, age 16, USA
	Nope, 5 years doesn't matter with love. Everything will be fine in 5 years.
	It matters that you're still technically a kid and he's an adult. It matters that you don't have the wisdom or maturity yet to judge what his intentions really are, or to deal well with the consequences of what you choose.
	DON'T DO IT! HE JUST WANTS TO HAVE SEX WITH YOU! IF HE REALLY LIKES YOU, HE WOULD RESPECT YOU.
	Any guy that says, "It's not all about the sex," is lying.
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Dear Panel, I don't know whether or not he is serious or just wants to fool around. What should I say to him? – Mushu Female, age 18, USA
	Depends. Are YOU serious?
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Dear Panel, When is the right time to have sex? – Confused & Embarrassed Female, age 21, USA
	Evening.
	When you're in a committed relationship; when you're practicing birth control and safe sex; and when you're not in a terribly public place.
	When you're ready.
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Dear Panel, My boyfriend doesn't want me going anywhere with my friends unless he's there. He says they're bad influences. Should I go with friends or keep doing as he says? – Babygirl Female, age 17, USA
	It's a FREE country. You have every right to do what you want provided that you won't hurt someone.
	Don't let him control you. Tell him to get over it or go.
	Read some books about jealousy and abusive boyfriends. Then go out with your friends.
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Dear Panel, I recently started dating my ex again (we dated for a year and 8 months) and I have found out about all the guys she has messed around with. They are all her friends (still) and one is her best friend who I work with. They played strip poker and kissed. I still love her, but I get jealous all the time now. Should I be mad at her and should I worry? – Donny Male, age 19, Maryland
	If you can't handle it, don't handle it.
	What she did while you two weren't together really isn't your business, but if you're particularly worried that she is more than friends with them, then talk to her.
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Dear Panel, How can I find a different guy, when I compare them to my ex constantly? – Kayla Female, age 17, USA
	Compare any new guy to me instead, the new guy will seem much better.
	Get over your ex first...then start looking.
	There is a reason that you broke up with your ex. If a new guy DOES compare to your ex, steer clear.
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Dear Panel, I have a boyfriend here, we've been together since last year. But these past few weeks, I think he doesn't love me anymore. I think he loves my best friend now. Should I get angry with my best friend? Or should I break up with my boyfriend? – Girly Female, age 16, Canada
	As to your best friend: according to what you have written, the worse she MIGHT have done, is been loved by your boyfriend. This is not her fault, unless she encouraged him. As to your boyfriend: if you can't ask him if he has feelings for your best friend, then you don't have much of a relationship.
	If you can PROVE that's he's playing you, break up with him! But don't jump to conclusions.
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Dear Panel, How should I tell my parents I'm pregnant??!! – Scared Female, age 15, USA
	Sit your parents down and explain that the situation and tell them that you want their forgiveness. They might be mad at first but that's normal. Tell them that you need their help in deciding what to do from here. Just remember to tell them that you want to take responsibility for what you do in your life.
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Dear Panel, I was speaking to a girl about (arranged) marriage and we were quite friendly on the phone for a while. She now tells me that she has a defect on her body and I don't think I want to go ahead with the process anymore. I deeply feel sorry for her and ashamed of myself. How do I let her know the bad news gently, bearing in mind she must have heard it 100 times before? All your help is highly appreciated. – Anon.UK.com Male, age 26, UK
	It ain't the package, it's what is inside, you insensitive (insert selected swear word here).

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