Dear panel,

Four years ago my husband left me and moved in with another woman. After he had been there a month, he called and begged to come home. We had a 9 year old son who missed him very much, so I let him come back.  He made the usual promises of no contact, etc.  I just found out recently that he's maintained contact with this woman for the past years.  He says it's platonic, but I'm devastated. 

I can't find the heart to stay in this marriage, hostsm.gifbut I don't want to hurt our 13 year old son.  Please help me!

Sincerely Yours,



I know I would worry about my son too in this situation, but how good a situation can it be for him to live in a house where there is no trust and no honesty?  Kids need parents who love them, regardless of whether they live together or not.  Mothers need fathers who love them, too.  And love means trust and honesty, which doesn't exist in this relationship.  I think Marilyn should leave her husband (better yet, kick him out!) and make sure she lets her son know that this was not his fault, and that both of his parents do and will continue to love him.  What do you think?

 I say, kick him out, by the end of the month. I once had a friend who wasn't all that great to or for me (can you guess who I'm talking about?). While my husband and I were dating, I told him about this guy in a "ha ha" kind of way. My future husband said he was uncomfortable with me seeing him, even though we were just friends, given what I'd told him about our relationship. He asked me to not see the guy anymore, and I did what he asked. That was good for us. In Marilyn's case, her husband is seeing the woman he left her for and doesn't care enough about her feelings to cut it off? He's insensitive, unreliable, and a lout. She can't find the heart to stay in the marriage?! She needs to find the gumption to get out for good.


You go, girl!  And you go too, Marilyn!


I agree. In fact she should kick him out FOR her son's sake.


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