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Dear Panel,


 This is where the main problem lies.  We have hung out a couple times since then and we always end up in bed. [...]

So, after all of that, is he using me?  He never seemed like that kind of person but then again I never thought he would leave me either.  Should I break all ties for my own well being?  Should I hold onto my last shred of hope that someday soon we will be together?  I love him a lot and I miss him constantly.  Somebody please help.yelbtblk.gif


Alicia Answers:

Your ex-boyfriend is not helping your recovery after this relationship at all.  It is really hard to let go for him and for you, but he is seeing someone else and keeps you around as a crutch to fall back on.  It might not be intentional and he's

But he IS using her.

hopeTinL.gifprobably not trying to hurt you or to use you, but you both let it happen because it feels good and right.  Then when his hormones settle he has to tell you that its not gonna go anywhere, that he doesn't want to give it another try, or whatever,

I agree, I've been there, I had to do that.

readerTF.gifand I can imagine it breaks your heart all over again.  

Don't let him do it to you.  I am of the belief that after the breakup of a serious relationship the only healthy way to get over it is by not seeing each other at all.

Exactly! End it.

  maretin.gifYou need to lay those feelings to rest and live a life of your own.  By the time he comes around again you might not even want it.  But belive me, letting him have sex with you isn't gonna make it any easier for you to get your own life.

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