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I recently met a girl who was involved with another guy who was obviously stringing her along.  She told me she loved him, and needed to pursue the relationship.  He has since broken up with her, and she appears to be in a deep depression.  I called her only once to let her know I was thinkning about her and to tell her evrything will be okay. 

What could I do to get her to look to me as a prospective boyfriend?  Should I send her flowers or a letter, and what should I say to her when I call?  I don't want to pester her, or get her to hate me, but she is very beautiful and smart and will have no problem finding a new guy.  I WANT THAT GUY TO BE ME!  Please help, thanks!yelbtblk.gif

 

Alicia Answers:

Unfortunately, when it comes to things like this, girls are dumb.  We have been taught to want the wrong guys and look past the good ones.  All you can do is be available to this girl as a friend, and if she's really dumb, she'll accept your friendship but tell you that you can't be her boyfriend because "you deserve better", you're "too good of a friend", or she's "not ready". 

In terms of getting over this other guy, she's going to have to do it on her own.  She has to want to get over him, she has to identify the patterns in

This is the purpose of dating.

guestFtin.gif her life that are making her gravitate to destructive relationships.  You can really help her boost her self esteem by letting her know that you think she's beautiful and smart, but by being her friend,

For advice on how to let her know your feelings see the answer to Love Lorn.

guestFtin.gif you are in no way guaranteed to get her to be your girlfriend. 

If you really like her and its worth it to you, pursue it, but know that you are leaving yourself open

But you need to give her some time first.

guestFtin.gif to the same heartache that she is currently experiencing.

 

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