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How do I get past girlfriend's ambivalence for sex?

Dear Panel,

My girlfriend and I are very in love. However, she is not used to the way I treat her. She has been in many bad relationships in the past where her "significant other" has been extremely poor to her. According to her, I treat her like a queen.

Now, I love her very much, and want to please her; mentally, spiritually, and physically. I believe I have the first two pegged. We enjoy each others company and love to talk and cuddle. But... We have had many extremely passionate "make out sessions." I please her, and she would like me to advance on her (as in stroking and petting her vaginal area) but every time I try, she pulls back and we end up "taking a rest."

 I've always told her that I don't want to make her uncomfortable, yet she maintains that she would like me to advance on her... and every time I try, she pulls back. And she says that she thinks it's because she was "traumatized" in her past relationships. While I am happy with our relationship where it is, needless to say, I'm also rather confused! What advice can you give me?


Build the relationship around something else.


Let her take charge

Caring and time will complete relationship.







See Also:
Why won't my girlfriend have sex with me more often?
Should I keep trying, if she isn't?

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