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Dear Panel,

My girlfriend and I are very in love. However, she is not used to the way I treat her. She has been in many bad relationships in the past where her "significant other" has been extremely poor to her. According to her, I treat her like a queen.

Now, I love her very much, and want to please her; mentally, spiritually, and physically. I believe I have the first two pegged. We enjoy each others company and love to talk and cuddle. But... We have had many extrememly passionate "make out sessions." I please her, and she would like me to advance on her (as in stroking and petting her vaginal area) but every time I try, she pulls back and we end up "taking a rest."

 I've always told her that I don't want to make her uncomfortable, yet she maintains that she would like me to advance on her... and every time I try, she pulls back. And she says that she thinks it's because she was "traumatized" in her past relationships. While I am happy with our relationship where it is, needless to say, yelbtblk.gif

I'm also rather confused! What advice can you give me?

Mare Answers:

Dear Happy but Frustrated,

I am glad that you are happy, because I am one of those rare, sensitive guys who feels that cuddling is very important in a relationship and in emotional bonding.  I wonder, do you share PDA's too?

However, the other part of being a guy is to like raw, unadulturated, gorilla sex.

That may be the problem: she is trying to satisfy his urges rather than doing what SHE wants to do,

aliciaLtin.gif Your girlfriend sounds as though she appreciates you and is trying hard to satisfy tboth your sexual urges.  It certainly sounds like this can be worked out over time with the right caring attitude.

If she thinks that this is because of her past traumas, professional therapy might be appropriate.  Good luck in maintaining and building a strong relationship.

Lefty

Tell us what you think grnbut.gif

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