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Dear Panel,

Hi I am 16 years old and my boyfriend is 18 going on 19 on DEC 4th. My parents don't know that I'm dating him. Well a few weeks ago he asked me to marry him and I said "yes". I do love him and I want to be with him forever. But do you think its to soon for me to be engaged. Oh I should mention I already got the engagement ring.
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really confused and lost (I'm blond)

Mare Answers:

Normally, I don't make the marriage decision for you, but since you asked, YES, it's too

I disagree because I've been in that girl's position before.

guestFtin.gifsoon for you to be engaged!  What's your hurry?  Why haven't you introduced this man to your parents?  If he's good enough to marry, why not bring him home?  And last but not least,

Yes, but she can dye her hair.

guestFtin.gifdo you think that being blond means that you are dumb?  Everything about your question suggests that you don't feel ready to be married.  After all, would you have written to us if you felt 100% great about the engagement?

Since you are only 16 years old, you are not racing against your biological clock.   You've got AT LEAST 15 years (25 by some counts) before your deadline for having kids. So, take your time.  I think you should introduce the man to your family and start there.  The way a partner treats your family is a good indication of how kind and generous he is.

If that isn't enough, do a little research.  Ask around and find some women who got married when they were 16.  Ask them if they would have done it again, knowing what they know now.  I'm sure you'll find a few who had happy marriages and lives.  But, I bet that you'll find many more who regret it.

Hey, I married my high schoo sweet heart.

  guestFtin.gifAlmost all of my friends who married before they were 25 regret doing it, are divorced now, or went through particularly troubled times.  Even those who are still with their original husbands wish that they had waited longer before tying the knot. 

 

Tell us what you think grnbut.gif

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