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Is my friendship ruining my romance?

Dear Panel,

My name is Melissa and I am a 21 year old college student.

My boyfriend's name is Kyle. He attends the same college as me. We have been together for almost 2 and a half years now.

Kyle and I have been together for a long time, and he is the most special person in my life. He is truly a gentleman, and the most caring, sweetest, funniest person I have ever met. He is also very attractive. He treats me better than I have ever been treated before. Basically, he's everything I've ever wanted. Since we've been dating, he has always been there for me.

About 6 months ago I moved out of the house I had been living in up at school. My roommates basically turned on me and treated me like crap, so I moved in with another friend of mine. I was really depressed for a while, and I still haven't really gotten over their deceitful behavior.

My Boyfriend Became My Best Friend

Since then I have been really afraid to have friends, and the only "friend" I trust is my boyfriend. I've become really withdrawn and afraid to trust others, making me really lonely when my boyfriend isn't around. I feel like I'm relying on my boyfriend as more of a best friend, and I'm so confused.

He's the only person I'm interested in and I love him very much. When I'm with him I feel so lucky to have him, and I know that I love him so much as my boyfriend. But when I'm away from him, I miss him as my best friend. I don't really miss all the intimate things we do, I just want his company and to talk and have fun.

I guess my question is, do you think that my feelings are basically because when I'm away from him, I don't really have the friendship that I have when I'm with him?

I don't want to be in a relationship with anyone other than him. I guess I just want to get another opinion - if I could get over my fears of getting screwed over by people I consider as my friends, then maybe I will see Kyle as more of my boyfriend rather than my best (and basically only) true friend when I'm away from him.

The Friendship Takes the Romance Away

I guess it's kind of somewhat ruining our relationship by me relying on him more as my best friend than my boyfriend. I guess it kind of takes some of the romance away. It's also caused me to have a lot of doubts as to whether or not we're meant to be together, or just as best friends.

I know that I love him, it's just I've been questioning it so much lately whenever I'm away from him. But when I'm with him I couldn't be happier. I just don't want to lose him just because the one thing I really need right now is friends, and I don't want to take the person that I love for granted.

I guess I'm just really neurotic about this lately, because I don't want to lose the one person I've ever really cared about just because I'm analyzing things too much in my head. Please help me by giving me your advice.

Am I just making up relationship problems by overanalyzing things?



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