Dear Saibhin and Jacob,
My question is - WHAT?!?
You two really have some problems.
More Than Once Isn't a Mistake
First off Saibhin, why are you with this guy?!? He's hurt you, but you insist that you love him. People can make mistakes, but more than once isn't a mistake!
However, you want to stay with him so badly so I say this:
Learn To Trust Him If That's Your Only Choice
Trust him. So he did wrong but you are insisting that you stay with him so that is the only choice that you have. He hurt you, but for some reason you really want to stay with him, so for you to be in this relationship you must learn to trust him.
My question to you is Is it worth it?!? Think about that.
Deal With Your Insecurities First
As for you Jacob, you have issues you need to address. The way I see it is because of what one woman did to you, you are letting that affect the other relationships you have with women. You are insecure, and before you can put your whole heart and soul into a relationship, you need to make sure that you are okay with yourself.
I don't doubt that you love this woman, but you need to stop lying and that's why Saibhin is constantly cautious of you. I think that you are always going back to her because she is always taking you back no matter what you do. So if you want your relationship to work, I suggest that you show her that she is the most important person in your life and mean it!!!
Spend Time Apart
In closing, I think that both of you keep running to each other because you both do not know what you want. And conveniently, you both let each other back into your lives. I suggest that both of you take time apart and figure out if you belong together. It can spare you both a lot of heartache that you guys do not need.
I wish you both luck...
What do you think of Answer?