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Was I just the rebound girl?

Dear Panel,

...Matt confronted me about these feelings in the middle of August, actually six days after Jodi broke up with him. He told me he felt the same way. ...He's been home since Friday night and now it's Sunday. I've talked to him twice but he hasn't said anything about seeing me. It just kills me...

-- Katie

Female, age 17, Canada

[read the entire question below]

Dear Panel,

I am seventeen years old, and I had never really had a serious boyfriend before Matt. I had a mad crush on him for a year before we got together, and during that time we became pretty good friends. I really wanted a long term relationship with him. He is the only person I have ever gone out with that I actually had these feelings for.

This Summer Matt Was With Jodi

Matt was going out with this chick Jodi at the beginning of the summer when we were placed at the same pool to lifeguard. I still had a mad crush on him but he seemed happy with her. Matt only has long term relationships. He is not a player at all, he's a romantic and wants everything to be perfect.

Jodi broke up with Matt sometime in August. Apparently he had been asking my friend Meg all through July if I was interested in him. He told Meg he was also interested in me, and when Jodi broke up with him, this continued. Matt confronted me about these feelings in the middle of August, actually six days after Jodi broke up with him. He told me he felt the same way.

Matt and I Got Together

We decided to start seeing each other and not to get too serious because he was leaving for univeristy three weeks later. When it was time to leave, he told me he didn't want it to end, and neither did I, so we tried the long distance thing.

Everything was perfect. We visited each other in Toronto at the end of September and I have never been in a relationship more intense. By intense I mean just holding his hand or looking at him. I knew he felt the same way. We cared about each other so much.

He Started Acting Strange

Then he started acting a little strange. He was less affectionate in his email and on the phone and stuff. I asked him what was up, and he sent me an email saying he didn't think he left himself enough time to recover after Jodi and he needed some time to be single and sort out his feelings. He said he still liked me and still wanted to see me when he came home for Thanksgiving (this weekend).

He Hasn't Asked To See Me

He's been home since Friday night and now it's Sunday. I've talked to him twice but he hasn't said anything about seeing me. It just kills me. Why would he want to try a long distance relationship if he didn't feel strongly about me? You don't do that if its only a rebound, do you? Was I the rebound girl, or does he actually have feelings for me and want it to work someday?

- Katie

Female, age 17, Canada

Hallie, Judith, and Jimmy answer this question.

 

 

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