Dear Danice, First off I would just like to say, girlfriend, you need to get with the program. I don't mean disrespect in any way. I think it is fabulous that you have decided to remove yourself from the drug scene. Honor Your Parent's Wishes Let's start with the religious aspect that you kept referring to in your letter. I am glad that you believe strongly in God. Have you read the 10 Commandments? One of them speaks of honoring thy father and thy mother. My father is an alcoholic so, in a sense, I know where you're coming from there. This still does not mean that you can disrespect their wishes. Obviously they care for you somewhat or else they would not have filed a report with the police. I am glad you are changing your life for the better but you need to change for yourself. Not for anyone else. You parents are concerned, I feel, because of the age difference. You made the statement that your mother is vicariously trying to live through you. Parents do live through their children in a sense. They don't want you to make the same mistakes they have. Your Relationship Isn't Healthy As for your relationship with your boyfriend, I was not put on this Earth to judge others but it seems to me that you are using each other as crutches. I don't think this is a healthy way to start a relationship. Please don't misunderstand me. I am glad you both decided to give up drugs but what if, at some point, he is no longer in the picture. Will you go back to using drugs then? Find New Friends Your friends as you put it, are all addicts and drunks. Why do you hang out with them? I would think there is not anything worse than someone who recently kicked the drug habit to be hanging out with people that are still involved in that scene. Your friends don't see themselves as failures or they would be trying to do something about it. I am glad that you are looking for a job and trying to get your life straightened out. Take life one day at a time. Don't rush this relationship. If it was meant to be it will be. If not, look on it as a life changing experience. Get Counseling I also think you could benefit from counseling. There are programs out there that will help you. I am not trying to seem harsh or disrespectful but counseling would benefit you in many ways. I wish you all the luck in the world! |