I guess I'm writing all of this because I have a message that really needs to get out to the Love and Learn readers.
If you have read my bio, I said that I was a survivor of sexual abuse. To put it more bluntly, it was incest, inflicted upon me by my father from the time I was 6 to the time I was 18.
I left home at 18 leaving a 7-year-old sister behind. I left on a promise from my father that I was the only one, that he would never touch her.
I Wasn't The Only One
He lied. I came home to Washington to find that as soon as I left home, he started in on her. She is now 14. Suffice to say, the day she told me is the day I woke up and called the police. I contacted other family members only to find that my father did this to another of my sisters, as well as other young girls in his past.
He Went To Jail
My father was put in jail the night I called the police, oddly enough he was released the next morning in order for the prosecutor to have more time to gather evidence.
I went through hell that day trying to get my sister into protective custody. When it finally happened I played a few mind games with my father in order to force his hand. And I did.
He Took All His Sleeping Pills
He took all the sleeping pills he had in his possession and the coroner found his body in a hotel room.
I wasn't present at the scene, but two of my brothers were, and there is a lot of blame in my family right now.
Speak Up and Come Forward
I want to stress the importance of coming forward about this. I know firsthand about the fear of betrayal, about feeling dirty and ugly, and I now know the damage that can be done when one doesn't speak up.
This is a very ugly story, I'm not talking molestation, which is horrid enough in it's own right. I'm talking rape.
One case in which my stepmother held me down while my father took my virginity. It isn't pretty or nice, or some fairy tale with a happy ending, or justice being served, it's just my life.
I have learned one thing in all of this, and it is that my story is in no way, shape, or form unique. That frightens me. I am by no means a literary whiz, but if one person can read my story and find the strength to put an end to their own version of hell I think it is well worth posting.
Thank you for reading.